You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
