I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
