hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
