ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize