Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
