There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Randomize
