yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
