i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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