she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Walk of Shame today included voting.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
