but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize