did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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