So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
