I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
