paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
