That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i would punch a child for taco bell
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
