so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
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