We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
