State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
You're a waste of cheezeits
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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