Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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