youre lurking in front of me
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
