It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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