Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize