highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
There's always time for handjobs
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
