Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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