...so i touched it.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
