Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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