My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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