you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
