Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize