Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize