She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
