I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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