she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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