Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
My dad just said "fuck circus"
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