so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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