Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
