I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
