Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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