Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize