just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
