It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
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