I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
