shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
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