Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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