What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
