I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
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