people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
