i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
You did what with his pubic hair?
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