For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
