SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
