i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
